My departure from New York City took place after my trip to Europe, and hearing that VOICE in Venice. I spoke about my phone ringing in my apartment just as I entered it....it was Barbara Horgan, (Mr. Balanchine's assistant.) She told me the startling news that he wanted me to go to Geneva, and be piano soloist for that company. It was directed by Patricia Neary, (Colleen's older sister). I knew Colleen, but never had met Pat. Mr. B was the ARTISTIC DIRECTOR, and Pat was the Director...(meaning day to day). So although I had never been to Geneva, nor knew any of the people there, I WAS totally familiar with the work, of course. Pat had kindly arranged for me to stay with one of the dancers (Ellen was her name) until I could find a suitable apartment of my own. Barbara asked me to come to her office the next day to meet Pat (who was in town) and pick up my working visa and contract for the position. I did as she asked, and when I met Pat, thanked her profusely for arranging a place for me to stay temporarily. I also took the opportunity to pick up a few pieces of music from the music room (while there was no one there to question me!)
When I thought about Geneva, no picture came to my mind. (Not surprising, I dare say.) Actually I felt as though I was looking at a blank screen, or a brick wall. A very strange feeling. But I knew this was a definitive moment.... and there aren't too many of those in life. Although, I must say, this was one of many for me. A few days later, I left my NYC apartment (and Piano) with my friends, Marilee and Clorinda, who were doing their level best to remain cheerful. But all three of us were teary. While checking myself and baggage onto my flight, I thought of all the other times I had traveled, but with the assistance of others....baggage handlers, etc., thanks to being a part of the NYCB. I have said previously how convenient that was...and not fully appreciated until I was no longer part of that organization.
I purchased a coffee and a magazine, and sat down in the waiting area for Swissair. There were no cell phones at that time, so couldn't call anyone. So many things have changed since that era; young people these days cannot even imagine NOT having a cell phone or a gadget to listen to tapes. [At this very moment in time, am watching a retrospective of Johnny Carson's life and the TONIGHT SHOW. I always watched him and remember being so sad when his show ended....and recall Bette Midler singing to him..."ONE FOR MY BABY AND ONE MORE FOR THE ROAD." Another talk show host took over, Jay LENO, who was introduced to America on Johnny's show....(Jay had a lot of black hair then). And now he has retired, and Jimmy FALLON is the latest TONIGHT SHOW host. But none will ever come close to Johnny. He really was the quintessential talk show host. (And at this moment, David LETTERMAN is soon to retire; Barbara Walters HAS retired after 50 years on TV. Life moves on...and we all move with it. Johnny was a heavy smoker, and paid the price for that...he eventually died from a lung disease in 2005...don't know if it was emphysema. But for me, he was one of the funniest men in the world.]
Anyway the flight to Geneva was very smooth and comfortable. Swissair is (or was) one of the very best airlines, and the cuisine was excellent. It was the only airline I ever took to Europe during my 9 years of exile (!). None of the American airlines could compare....even the atmosphere in the Swissair terminal was calm and very organized...giving off an air of extreme competence.
My arrival in Geneva was more or less uneventful. The manager of the company, whose name was Pierre, met me...holding a sign with my name on it! He was a rather unusual looking fellow, with dark eyes, and dark complected....and of course, fluent in English. He was Swiss-French, had been a dancer in the Geneva company, and then continued his career as an administrator. He drove me to Ellen's apartment, which (I think) was above a restaurant in the center of town. I recall the tiny elevator, which was a bit rickety...and ascended very slowly to her floor. It is odd how certain details stand out in one's mind....like that elevator, for example...and the smell of raclette and cheese fondue, which I grew to love while in Switzerland. Ellen took me on a walking tour of Geneva (not a huge city)...where I saw the famous flower clock downtown. The next day I took a bus and streetcar tour by myself...(that became my favorite way of sightseeing.) I would not have to worry about driving, directions, or parking and could just ride and look. (I highly recommend it).
My first day in the studio was very interesting. Pat was a very colorful character (she still is)! She always gave class and took it at the same time! I had never seen anyone do that. Her energy level was amazing, and didn't seem to flag. Even when she was sick, she used to say, "I'm sick PLUS I don't feel well!" (That was funny, to me anyway.) One of the ballets being taught was COPPELIA, and Mme. Danilova was there to stage it. She was a true Grande Dame, and always very entertaining. I adored the lady, as did most of her students at SAB where she taught. (She and Mr. B were famously close, and she always did as he wished....including setting Coppelia at NYCB. I had played for many of those rehearsals also. I recall the time when she and I decided to attend an opera at the GRANDE THEATRE DE GENEVE...after all, we were already there. The evening of the opera we were a bit late in leaving the studio, so out on the street and taking hold of each other's hands, we RAN up the hill to the front of the house. I have to say that lady could really RUN!!!
Two dancers (married) who became very close friends in Geneva were Deborah Dobson and Jonas Kage. They had been principal dancers in ABT (American Ballet Theater), and then were offered contracts in Geneva. Debbie and Jonas and I had many adventures together. I remember going cross country skiing with them and another guy (French), and at some point I just couldn't continue. My legs were giving out. Jonas just picked me up and carried me on his back down the slight hill. (Cross country skiing is more difficult than downhill skiing, in my opinion, anyway.) He was very strong, obviously...and I was very grateful. On another occasion (a few years later) we all went on a cruise on Jonas' cousin's yacht in the Bering Sea! That was fun! Since we were on the yacht a few days, we docked at a small island (I think the property was owned by Jonas' cousin) where there was a sauna. So Debbie and I got off the boat to enter the sauna....in towels. Everyone else inside was totally unclothed, and we were quite taken aback. One of the gentleman in the sauna was OUR dentist from Zurich....who waved at us as we walked in. I remember Debbie giggling so hard....but we didn't take our towels off. I have often laughed to myself at that one!
Over the next few years, many dancers from the NYCB came to Zurich, including one of my great friends....Christine Redpath, who is presently ballet mistress at NYCB. She began there (after her dancing was finished) by working for Jerry Robbins. I was able to return her sage advice (to me from years before)....'to never let Jerry know that one was upset by him.' Another dancer and wonderful friend, was Elise Flagg....who came there and danced with Rudolph Nureyev. He liked her very much...partly because she was so little, and he had no problem lifting her! And Elise was a very technically proficient dancer as well. Also her sister, Laura Flagg Pitts (who is much on my mind of later) came there with her husband, Bryan Pitts. Unfortunately, they didn't stay very long....only 9 months. Plus Debbie Austin (with then husband Hartmout), Amanda Bennett (before she went to Basel). Mandy became Director of the Basel Ballet School....and still is. She was a fantastic dancer; I have seen her on the ARTS CHANNEL here in Seattle, dancing with Sheldon Schwartz....Heinz Spoerli's PULCINELLA. A good friend from NYCB, Gerry Ebitz also came to Zurich (and later to PNB). He married Kay Preston...(who unfortunately passed away several years ago....she was murdered by an ex-boyfriend...a horror story if ever there was one.) Elizabeth Carr and Lucette Katerndahl also came to join the Geneva company, and moved to Zurich...but stayed only a short time.
One of my roommates, Laura Smeak, a fantastic and unusual dancer from NYC (not City Ballet, but another company), had a very wonderful sense of humor. She married a Swiss fellow who worked at CERN in Geneva, and now lives there (she moved back after Pat left Zurich). We have re-connected again via Facebook, for which I am most grateful. She and Elise and I were all great friends. She told me she has a son who is a huge fan of Michael Jackson's, and when she told him she had a good friend (Dianne) who had known Michael, he was just ecstatic. It is great to know that present day young people are finding Michael relevant. He was such a great artist and person....and his music is very popular. I find that wonderful...I cannot imagine anyone who would not love Michael's music. I just wish he were still here to compose more of it.
I remember when Elise moved to Zurich and lived in a very small apartment (Elise size) for a time, before her then husband, Michael Romano joined her. They found a larger apartment, and Michael (who already was a well-known chef) became the top chef in the best French restaurant in Zurich. Of course, we were all treated to fabulous dinners from his kitchen, as well as fantastic wines. Plus restaurant jaunts..Michael knew all the best places. One evening Rudi (Nureyev) was invited to dinner by Michael and Elise...(as well as Chrissy and myself...she was my roommate at that time). That was some evening! Rudi persuaded Michael to dance a tango with him in the living room! A few years back, I spoke with Michael on the phone, and asked him if he remembered that evening. He said, "Dianne, I am so glad you reminded me of that...I thought perhaps I had imagined the entire thing. And no one ever believes my story!" But it was definitely true....I WAS THERE!
There are so many stories circulating in my head...and not space or time enough to tell them all. But one comes to mind: On one of our vacation breaks, I took a trip to Majorca, to visit the home of Chopin, and see the caves and other sights. I went by myself, which turned out to be fun...I could do what I wanted when I wanted. Unfortunately, I came in contact with some tainted food in the HOTEL, of all things, near the end of the trip. So I was on the plane when the uncomfortable feelings began. Ugh! I just prayed that I would make it home (to Zurich) before a nasty accident happened. As luck would have it, I did make it home....just in time. The next few days I spent in bed, sick as a dog, and not able to work at all. The doctor was called (either by Chrissy or Albi, Pat's assistant)...and he came over. (Can you imagine house calls from a physician in America?) I had a particularly virulent form of food poisoning, and one just had to basically wait for it to pass. The phone rang, and it was Rudi (Nureyev), who said he knew I was sick, but was wondering if there was ANY possibility I could come in and play RUBIES (Stravinsky) for him? He wanted to learn the music first (by ear) before learning the steps to the ballet with his partner...who was going to be Elise! (That was a FIRST, don't know any other dancer who ever thought of doing that!!) And it was a testament to his thoroughness as an artist. Unfortunately, I told him, it was not possible for me to even sit at the piano, let alone play Stravinsky! He understood, and said he would call me the next day, which he did. I was still too ill to come, but thought I might be able to possibly come the following day. And he called yet again that day....and told me he would bring a bucket!!! Some beautiful flowers arrived at my apartment from him! Well, to make a long story a bit shorter, I did struggle out of bed to the studio that day...Chrissy drove me to the studio, which was of great assistance. And I was able to play all of the Capriccio for him...(he sat next to me at the piano during this session.) Instead of telling him the counts Mr. B had used for the choreography, I told him to count the music as HE HEARD it, which he did. That worked for him. Stravinsky isn't an easy composer to understand, but Rudi was a very musical person, and meticulous in his preparation. I played all the entrance passages several times for him, so he would know (without counting) when he needed to come onstage. There are several places in each movement for the principal couple to enter, so even with no steps learned as yet, he learned the music!!! I think this was the most unusual rehearsal I ever played...with the dancer sitting next to me on the piano bench!!!
Friday, May 30, 2014
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
MORE STORIES/ADVENTURES....(Chapter 22)
This is a tale of a chance encounter with Mr. Balanchine in an elevator at the State Theater. It began with the door opening on the Stage Level, where I was waiting for it. Mr. B was already in the elevator and did not get out, saying he was going up to his office on the 4th floor. Which is where I was headed as well. So I got in the elevator....there was a pause, and then he asked me how I was.....to which I answered that I was very well. THEN he made an unusual remark...."deeer, I could get you Very Nice Piano." Hmm. Well, where did that come from, I wondered? And I answered that I HAD a very nice piano, to which he then added..."Very nice Steinway"...Oh...thought I, this is getting interesting. And I said, "well, Mr. Balanchine, I have a very good Steinway." Undaunted, he said, "well, I can get you better and newer one, then you will have two!" I didn't want to say that my apartment wouldn't be large enough to accommodate two Steinway pianos, lest he might mention that he could get me a large condo! So I said nothing. He then said, "you know, deeer, I like pianists also...not only dancers." By now this was getting just a tad uncomfortable, and I was wishing the elevator would move faster! But as luck would have it, the darn thing stopped on every floor. But at least more people got on, precluding the need for further conversation with Mr. B. I stood there (very uncomfortable, I might add) and told him I had a rehearsal for which I was a bit unprepared and needed to run through the score beforehand. I am sure he was amused at my discomfiture (I was NOT amused, of course). However, he never again made such an obvious overture, at least not in NYC. No, he waited until Zurich (a few years later!) He changed his tactic, and asked Pat to speak to me on his behalf! Oh Great!!! She did speak to me (in a rehearsal one day)...and I asked her to please pass a message that I was 'involved' with a cellist, and therefore not available. (That was true.) But....he had something else up his sleeve. Sneaky man! During his visit, I had a rehearsal one evening with my cellist friend (for some upcoming concerts). Pat phoned me there (at Mr. B's request, she said) to invite me to dinner at her house (where he was cooking). She said he was adamant that I must come as he wanted to speak to me about a new ballet... DAVIDSBUNDLER TANZEN, which he had just finished choreographing. Of course, I could not say no....one just didn't do that. When I told my cellist friend, Christian, that I needed to leave, he was very puzzled (and a bit annoyed). He didn't understand that any of us would just drop everything when Mr. B requested our presence. No...most people didn't understand that...(but they didn't work for the man, either.) So I just said that I was very sorry to leave, but we would have to re-schedule our rehearsal. And I left! That was how it was with Mr. B....he had the power. The conclusion of this story is that I remained good friends with him until the end of his life, and went out to dinner with him several times in Zurich....but that other subject never came up again. THANK GOODNESS!. When he was very ill I visited him in hospital in New York City (I had traveled there to play for the Basel Ballet)...and he was still lucid and talkative. I returned to Zurich for a very short time, to rehearse the company for a tour to Washington D.C. with Rudi Nureyev. The night before we left for America, I had a very clear dream that Mr. Balanchine had passed away....and awoke crying. I told my roommate, Christine Redpath about my dream...and indeed when we deplaned in NYC, learned of his passing. I have had many such dreams....(one about Michael Jackson as well.) I have no idea from whence or why these dreams occur. But they do.
This next story involves a LIEBESLIEDER WALZER performance at the State Theater (as it was called then) in NYC. Now I always left my apartment early enough to travel to the theater in plenty of time to get dressed, warm up, and generally be ready for the performance. This particular evening was no exception. At that time I lived on 109th Street and Broadway, so left even earlier. When I got to the street, saw that the traffic was NOT moving...and the bus I normally took, was just stopped. A real traffic jam! I ran to the nearest subway tunnel, and found the same situation...the trains were going nowhere! So ran back up the stairs, into the street, and flagged down a motorist who was stopped at a light (he looked like a nice guy). and begged him to take me to the NY State Theater backstage entrance. (He knew where it was.) I offered him money for this, but he refused....saying this was a unique opportunity for him to drive the NYCB piano soloist to her performance! He was into it! He did some fancy maneuvering and by a miracle, I arrived at the theater five (5) minutes before the performance was supposed to start. After promising my chauffeur tickets to a performance, and expressing my profuse thanks, I ran into the theater and up one flight of stairs, to the Stage Level (never mind the slow elevator). Mme. Pourmel was waiting for me with my Liebeslieder gown....bless her heart! The dress was put on me, my hair was done by two people, then make-up applied, and voila! I was ready! I picked up my music (thank goodness I hadn't left it in that car!) and walked onto the stage to the piano, where Robert was already seated. The dancers were in place....they were all waiting for me!! Robert said in his best British accent, "dear, where HAHVE you been?" Breathless, I said nothing, sat down, put the music on the piano, and at that very moment the curtain WENT UP.....so we started our introduction to the first waltz! AND not even a minute late! Mr. B was in his customary position in the wings...by the piano....and just said to me "Good to see you here, deeeer!" His little joke, of course!
This next story involves a LIEBESLIEDER WALZER performance at the State Theater (as it was called then) in NYC. Now I always left my apartment early enough to travel to the theater in plenty of time to get dressed, warm up, and generally be ready for the performance. This particular evening was no exception. At that time I lived on 109th Street and Broadway, so left even earlier. When I got to the street, saw that the traffic was NOT moving...and the bus I normally took, was just stopped. A real traffic jam! I ran to the nearest subway tunnel, and found the same situation...the trains were going nowhere! So ran back up the stairs, into the street, and flagged down a motorist who was stopped at a light (he looked like a nice guy). and begged him to take me to the NY State Theater backstage entrance. (He knew where it was.) I offered him money for this, but he refused....saying this was a unique opportunity for him to drive the NYCB piano soloist to her performance! He was into it! He did some fancy maneuvering and by a miracle, I arrived at the theater five (5) minutes before the performance was supposed to start. After promising my chauffeur tickets to a performance, and expressing my profuse thanks, I ran into the theater and up one flight of stairs, to the Stage Level (never mind the slow elevator). Mme. Pourmel was waiting for me with my Liebeslieder gown....bless her heart! The dress was put on me, my hair was done by two people, then make-up applied, and voila! I was ready! I picked up my music (thank goodness I hadn't left it in that car!) and walked onto the stage to the piano, where Robert was already seated. The dancers were in place....they were all waiting for me!! Robert said in his best British accent, "dear, where HAHVE you been?" Breathless, I said nothing, sat down, put the music on the piano, and at that very moment the curtain WENT UP.....so we started our introduction to the first waltz! AND not even a minute late! Mr. B was in his customary position in the wings...by the piano....and just said to me "Good to see you here, deeeer!" His little joke, of course!
Thursday, May 15, 2014
UNUSUAL REHEARSALS OR HAPPENINGS AT NYCB (Chapter 22)
It is time for a description of a few memorable happenings, rehearsals, performances at the NYCB. I will begin with a rehearsal which took place in the large studio at the KENNEDY CENTER Opera House in Washington D.C. Mr. Balanchine had decided to begin choreographing a new ballet for the RAVEL FESTIVAL called "SONATINE"...a lovely 3 movement work for piano by Maurice Ravel, of course. Two French dancers were called....Violette Verdy and Jean Pierre Bonnefous. I was playing for this rehearsal as I was scheduled to perform the work with them on stage. So we began the rehearsal by placing the piano diagonally across from the two of them.
Now if you have ever been around French people, you will know they tend to speak continuously and very fast. These two were no exception! One of my favorite dancers (and people) is definitely Violette. She is so musical, and I always enjoyed working with her. I had not worked much with Jean-Pierre, but found him a most pleasant fellow, who was always very polite. Today, however, Violette was in rare form. She did not stop talking WHILE Mr. B was choreographing! When he told her to do an 'Arabesque,' for example, she said..."oh J'adore Arabesque!" I began laughing softly to myself, as I had never heard anyone say that before! Then he told her to do a 'Promenade' with JP, and she said...."oh, J'adore Promenade!"
This was becoming a comedy....(I looked at Mr. B's face, and could see him laughing softly as well!) Then he directed them to go to the other side of the studio, but they were chattering so much they didn't hear him! So he said to me, "well, since they are over there, I will go there....it will save time." By now I was flabbergasted at the way this rehearsal was progressing...and trying my best NOT to laugh. When he told Violette to do a Pas de chat, and she AGAIN said..."oh, J'adore Pas de chat!" I nearly lost it then! So Mr. B started to choreograph a little solo for Jean-Pierre (who did NOT say..."J'adore"....whatever the step was. THANK Goodness!) Things continued in this fashion for the rest of the rehearsal....and somehow Mr. B managed to choreograph the entire piece (3 movements...about 15 minutes) during the time frame! Balanchine is a very skilled and efficient choreographer.....and when people are paying close attention, things go very quickly. But this rehearsal was another matter entirely. I actually couldn't believe it. There was no one else in the studio to witness this rehearsal....which was probably a good thing....who would believe it?!! When I described what happened to my colleague, Jerry, he had a difficult time believing me.
The next incident was not a rehearsal, but an occurrence.
In this Opera House, there was only one dressing room with a piano in it, so we 3 pianists were assigned to it. Also in the same space with us was Hugo, Robert (the two conductors), plus Mr. B. and Jerry Robbins as well! Of course we did not spend much time in that room, unless someone was practicing, however that seemed like too many people for one dressing area! I kept my coat, music, and concert dress in the closet....and only practiced (warmed up) before a performance. One day after rehearsal, I ran in there to get my coat to walk back to the hotel. There was no one in the sitting room, but I heard water running in the bathroom. I sat down at the piano to run through a certain passage of music, when the door to the bathroom opened. And out walked Mr. Balanchine clad only IN A TOWEL!!! He had no idea I was there and I had zero idea that he had been taking a shower! I was completely embarrassed, and turning beet red, got up from the piano! I apologized profusely, and just said..."I am leaving right now...so sorry! I could see that Mr. B. was MOST amused! And I ran out of the room as fast as I could! (This isn't the end of the story...) The next morning many of the girls entered the elevator on the bottom floor, followed by Mr. B. I was already there, and when he saw me, he smiled (wickedly, I might add) and said...."well, you see deeeer, TODAY I have my pants ON!!!!! Every head in that elevator whipped around to stare at me! I was mortified! Of course, Mr. B enjoyed that little joke very, very much. No one said a word....you could hear a pin drop, (if someone had dropped one!) As we were all walking to the big studio for class, one of my friends came up to me and said...."what was that all about anyway?" I started to explain when Mr. B came up to us, and I stopped talking. Then in class, he actually told the entire story...about the shower, my practicing the piano, and all the rest. Everyone had a good laugh, mostly at my expense! But at least those girls would know what had happened, and their imaginations could stop working overtime!
This is a story about me, performing in the orchestra pit. There was a young man at NYCB who had been hired as a 'gofer' for the company. One of his duties was to turn pages for us pianists in performances. (He was studying piano with Gordon, so he did read music). One evening I was playing 'RUBIES' (Capriccio for Piano and Orchestra, by Stravinsky).
While I know this music from memory, it is necessary to have the music at hand, just in case. After all, there are dancers on stage depending on the music, and thus on me. (This is quite a serious responsibility.) Turning pages is not an easy task....the page turner has to know the music and anticipate the performer's wishes. I made a habit of saying "TURN" just before I needed the page turned. This seemed to work well with most page turners, however this person was not one of them. He thought he knew BEST when to turn, and actually he did NOT! So.... on one occasion when he failed to respond to my directive, I told him (while still playing) that he needed to do as I wished, not as HE wished! Well, he seemed to become annoyed, and when he turned the next page, did it so angrily that the music FELL ON THE FLOOR!!! I was so shocked that I almost stopped playing, but didn't, of course. He seemed to be IN SHOCK and just froze. I had to say to him...."PLEASE pick up the music and put it on the piano to page_______ (whatever it was"). Hmph!!!! Robert Irving (conductor) noticed the brouhaha at the piano, and began glowering at both of us! Somehow this disaster didn't affect the performance on stage, thank goodness! But at the end of the piece, I (furious as could be) yelled at the hapless young man, telling him that was the LAST TIME he would turn pages for me!!! I told Jerry and Gordon about this incident. They had never experienced the music falling on the floor, but felt that he did not follow directions well at all. So....that was the end of that page turner....although he stayed on, working in other areas (but no more page turning!)
In re-reading this chapter, I see that many might conclude that most of my time spent with the NYCB was fraught with accidents or incidents.....both amusing and ridiculous! Well, that was partly true. I had garnered a reputation for being the one who got into 'situations.' While I was always very meticulous in rehearsals, I guess that 'things' just seemed to happen, for some reason. One of my friends said she thought a book based on The Perils of Pauline should be written....called The Perils of Dianne....about my rehearsals. I almost always enjoyed all my performances....either with orchestra or as a soloist...including the very lovely 'SONATINE.' However, Mr. Balanchine was insisting that I play this work from memory on stage with the dancers. He didn't want another person onstage turning pages...to disturb the stage scenario. Now playing from memory was 'par for the course' for any concert pianist, and I was accustomed to this. But this was a ballet performance, and the dancers depended on me. So I was a bit nervous about this turn of events. But Mr. B was adamant in this matter, so I just accepted his decision. For this onstage appearance, I had a very lovely Spanish dress, which my mother had bought for me in Mexico. It was black lace with colorful flowers embroidered on the entire dress....very elegant looking. This dress caused much comment. Violette thought it was too flamboyant for the ballet...especially since she and Jean-Pierre were wearing muted Blue and Grey. However, Mr. B loved the dress, and wanted me to wear it...so that was that! Many of my friends came to the performance to see THE DRESS, including Jerry and Gordon! On one evening before the performance, I was combing and arranging my hair in front of the mirror just outside the stage area. Then Mr. B came up to me, took the comb and began re-arranging my hair. He said, "hair has to look good, in case piano playing ISN'T!" I was quite shocked at that remark....he had a way of making a person feel uncomfortable. But I knew that he was trying to rattle me, and I refused to be intimidated. So I calmly said...."Mr. B, you would be very upset if I actually forgot what I was playing on stage, wouldn't you?" He chuckled at that one....he knew I would NOT forget the music, and was amused at my cheekiness.
That was the way it was there....always cat and mouse...(for everyone, I might add!)
Now if you have ever been around French people, you will know they tend to speak continuously and very fast. These two were no exception! One of my favorite dancers (and people) is definitely Violette. She is so musical, and I always enjoyed working with her. I had not worked much with Jean-Pierre, but found him a most pleasant fellow, who was always very polite. Today, however, Violette was in rare form. She did not stop talking WHILE Mr. B was choreographing! When he told her to do an 'Arabesque,' for example, she said..."oh J'adore Arabesque!" I began laughing softly to myself, as I had never heard anyone say that before! Then he told her to do a 'Promenade' with JP, and she said...."oh, J'adore Promenade!"
This was becoming a comedy....(I looked at Mr. B's face, and could see him laughing softly as well!) Then he directed them to go to the other side of the studio, but they were chattering so much they didn't hear him! So he said to me, "well, since they are over there, I will go there....it will save time." By now I was flabbergasted at the way this rehearsal was progressing...and trying my best NOT to laugh. When he told Violette to do a Pas de chat, and she AGAIN said..."oh, J'adore Pas de chat!" I nearly lost it then! So Mr. B started to choreograph a little solo for Jean-Pierre (who did NOT say..."J'adore"....whatever the step was. THANK Goodness!) Things continued in this fashion for the rest of the rehearsal....and somehow Mr. B managed to choreograph the entire piece (3 movements...about 15 minutes) during the time frame! Balanchine is a very skilled and efficient choreographer.....and when people are paying close attention, things go very quickly. But this rehearsal was another matter entirely. I actually couldn't believe it. There was no one else in the studio to witness this rehearsal....which was probably a good thing....who would believe it?!! When I described what happened to my colleague, Jerry, he had a difficult time believing me.
The next incident was not a rehearsal, but an occurrence.
In this Opera House, there was only one dressing room with a piano in it, so we 3 pianists were assigned to it. Also in the same space with us was Hugo, Robert (the two conductors), plus Mr. B. and Jerry Robbins as well! Of course we did not spend much time in that room, unless someone was practicing, however that seemed like too many people for one dressing area! I kept my coat, music, and concert dress in the closet....and only practiced (warmed up) before a performance. One day after rehearsal, I ran in there to get my coat to walk back to the hotel. There was no one in the sitting room, but I heard water running in the bathroom. I sat down at the piano to run through a certain passage of music, when the door to the bathroom opened. And out walked Mr. Balanchine clad only IN A TOWEL!!! He had no idea I was there and I had zero idea that he had been taking a shower! I was completely embarrassed, and turning beet red, got up from the piano! I apologized profusely, and just said..."I am leaving right now...so sorry! I could see that Mr. B. was MOST amused! And I ran out of the room as fast as I could! (This isn't the end of the story...) The next morning many of the girls entered the elevator on the bottom floor, followed by Mr. B. I was already there, and when he saw me, he smiled (wickedly, I might add) and said...."well, you see deeeer, TODAY I have my pants ON!!!!! Every head in that elevator whipped around to stare at me! I was mortified! Of course, Mr. B enjoyed that little joke very, very much. No one said a word....you could hear a pin drop, (if someone had dropped one!) As we were all walking to the big studio for class, one of my friends came up to me and said...."what was that all about anyway?" I started to explain when Mr. B came up to us, and I stopped talking. Then in class, he actually told the entire story...about the shower, my practicing the piano, and all the rest. Everyone had a good laugh, mostly at my expense! But at least those girls would know what had happened, and their imaginations could stop working overtime!
This is a story about me, performing in the orchestra pit. There was a young man at NYCB who had been hired as a 'gofer' for the company. One of his duties was to turn pages for us pianists in performances. (He was studying piano with Gordon, so he did read music). One evening I was playing 'RUBIES' (Capriccio for Piano and Orchestra, by Stravinsky).
While I know this music from memory, it is necessary to have the music at hand, just in case. After all, there are dancers on stage depending on the music, and thus on me. (This is quite a serious responsibility.) Turning pages is not an easy task....the page turner has to know the music and anticipate the performer's wishes. I made a habit of saying "TURN" just before I needed the page turned. This seemed to work well with most page turners, however this person was not one of them. He thought he knew BEST when to turn, and actually he did NOT! So.... on one occasion when he failed to respond to my directive, I told him (while still playing) that he needed to do as I wished, not as HE wished! Well, he seemed to become annoyed, and when he turned the next page, did it so angrily that the music FELL ON THE FLOOR!!! I was so shocked that I almost stopped playing, but didn't, of course. He seemed to be IN SHOCK and just froze. I had to say to him...."PLEASE pick up the music and put it on the piano to page_______ (whatever it was"). Hmph!!!! Robert Irving (conductor) noticed the brouhaha at the piano, and began glowering at both of us! Somehow this disaster didn't affect the performance on stage, thank goodness! But at the end of the piece, I (furious as could be) yelled at the hapless young man, telling him that was the LAST TIME he would turn pages for me!!! I told Jerry and Gordon about this incident. They had never experienced the music falling on the floor, but felt that he did not follow directions well at all. So....that was the end of that page turner....although he stayed on, working in other areas (but no more page turning!)
In re-reading this chapter, I see that many might conclude that most of my time spent with the NYCB was fraught with accidents or incidents.....both amusing and ridiculous! Well, that was partly true. I had garnered a reputation for being the one who got into 'situations.' While I was always very meticulous in rehearsals, I guess that 'things' just seemed to happen, for some reason. One of my friends said she thought a book based on The Perils of Pauline should be written....called The Perils of Dianne....about my rehearsals. I almost always enjoyed all my performances....either with orchestra or as a soloist...including the very lovely 'SONATINE.' However, Mr. Balanchine was insisting that I play this work from memory on stage with the dancers. He didn't want another person onstage turning pages...to disturb the stage scenario. Now playing from memory was 'par for the course' for any concert pianist, and I was accustomed to this. But this was a ballet performance, and the dancers depended on me. So I was a bit nervous about this turn of events. But Mr. B was adamant in this matter, so I just accepted his decision. For this onstage appearance, I had a very lovely Spanish dress, which my mother had bought for me in Mexico. It was black lace with colorful flowers embroidered on the entire dress....very elegant looking. This dress caused much comment. Violette thought it was too flamboyant for the ballet...especially since she and Jean-Pierre were wearing muted Blue and Grey. However, Mr. B loved the dress, and wanted me to wear it...so that was that! Many of my friends came to the performance to see THE DRESS, including Jerry and Gordon! On one evening before the performance, I was combing and arranging my hair in front of the mirror just outside the stage area. Then Mr. B came up to me, took the comb and began re-arranging my hair. He said, "hair has to look good, in case piano playing ISN'T!" I was quite shocked at that remark....he had a way of making a person feel uncomfortable. But I knew that he was trying to rattle me, and I refused to be intimidated. So I calmly said...."Mr. B, you would be very upset if I actually forgot what I was playing on stage, wouldn't you?" He chuckled at that one....he knew I would NOT forget the music, and was amused at my cheekiness.
That was the way it was there....always cat and mouse...(for everyone, I might add!)
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
MICHAEL, MY MAGNIFICENT FRIEND
How will you know that I am finished?
Really, really
How will I ever know the answer
To that question....
Inside my mind
Within my heart
There exists no
'Cease'
No grasping the concept of
'I am done.'
And yet
If God breathes this word,
'STOP'
On me
I will accept this from Him
I will be content in Him
I will be finished.
But.....considering my history
Taking into account my motivation
Understanding the power of my inspiration
I would expect that
You would never be finished
Receiving
Because I will never be finished
Creating
Only time will tell
Only God's time will tell.
(An excerpt from the full poem....written by
Michael Jackson. (c) 5/10/10 Rosalynn Smith)
Ros gave me this excerpt a few years ago when she learned of my friendship with Michael. I am including it here as well as another poem she recently received from him, and posted on Facebook. For those who are fans of Michael's, see below:
NO MATTER WHEN I AM AWAKE
Nor even when I cannot sleep,
I am never alone.
Desolate though my mind may feel,
My heart knows knows nothing of that care.
In my every moment
I am connected with
Others also not asleep
Others in whom
My essence is immersed
My needs attended to
Others who
Even not knowing their names
Even not seeing their faces -
Though their faces are in my mind's eye
Though their names are written on my heart -
Others whom I love unconditionally
Who love me equally
First and also in return.
I am blanketed in this affection.
For I am not a citizen of some place
I am a child of the world.
In sleeplessness
I turn to them -
My companions
Whom neither distance nor unawareness
Can separate from me -
I seek them out
In delight and in sorrow
In delight and in fear
In wonder and in doubt
They never fail me -
Never have
Never will -
And this
I pray they know.
Across eons and light years of time
Through burdens inconceivable to bear
Midst bliss indestructible -
In this earthbound reality
They are my only constant
Not even heaven deigns to intervene
For we transcended
Familiar conventions
We transcend, still
In our now,
For some while, separate
Realms.
Celebrations rise up for us,
There and here
Because
We bring delight and comfort
We offer comfort and hope
Our voices sing of opportunity
Our bodies move
In the dance of possibility
We confirm love
Beyond ourselves.
Unremarkable as we should be
We are, instead, exquisitely unique.
Through all the years there was of me,
This never changed
Except, perhaps, to grow
In number
In strength
In sincerity
You never changed
Towards me.
And I,
Therefore
Never knew the pain
Your absence would have been.
You are incomparable gifts
To my heart
To my life
To the fullness of my purpose.
This is the definition of
You for me:
Blessing given
Hope fulfilled
Joy eternal
Love requited.
Sleep now
Sweet angels there below
In peace we meet
In purpose revel
No matter that I wake or sleep
I know your constant presence
So I am not,
Not ever....
Alone.
Rosalynn Smith (c)2014
Michael's beautiful writing ability was not known to many.....except, of course, as it applied to his song lyrics. Somehow it just did not occur to people that his prose or poetry was from the same well as his lyrics! When I would tell anyone how wonderful his writing was, they were always surprised. Why? He was, in fact, a multi-gifted, multi-faceted individual who was a total Renaissance Man, as it were. Of course, those who worked with him realized he could sing, dance, write music, create shows, act, and etc. He also could paint and draw very well (many of his paintings were discovered after his death in a huge storage facility...at an airport which wasn't used much. He was also very athletic....and had he chosen to do so, could have been an ace runner, tennis pro, etc. He could DO just about everything, including cook! I cannot speak for others, only myself. From the onset I was very impressed by his abilities in music and dance; and although I have considerable ability in the field of music (being a professional musician and performer), I was stunned by how much he knew about music....and he was never FORMALLY schooled! He had a phenomenal ear and could hear the smallest errors on stage, WHILE performing himself. He really blew me away! I have worked with dancers all my life (as piano soloist with the NEW YORK CITY BALLET, PACIFIC NORTHWEST BALLET (in Seattle), and THE ZURICH COMPANY in Switzerland....so am very conversant with dance, particularly classical ballet and the Balanchine repertoire. I ALWAYS knew exactly how steps were connected to the music, and this particular ability led to my work with George Balanchine, Jerome Robbins, Rudi (Rudolph) Nureyev, etc. And my ability to sightread music easily was a handy little tool! I never thought much about it....it was easy for me, so I took it for granted. I remember remarking to Michael how his ability to pick up choreography at the drop of a hat, fascinated me. He looked at me in surprise, saying "well, Dianne, it is just how you can look at a piece of music and instantly play it! That really blows my mind!" Of course, he did not have a real appreciation of how quickly he did learn dance steps.....(I really wish he could have worked with a choreographer like Jerry Robbins, for example, whose works he could have danced wonderfully, I am sure. He hadn't trained to be a ballet dancer, and did not want to have the muscular thighs that most male dancers acquire via their training). No. Michael wanted the long lean look, so he trained for that type of musculature. When I watched him work, I always wondered which part of his brain he was using for dance, and which part for music. (I actually wished I could see inside that brain of his!). Because he was definitely a mixture of the two. I have to say I was totally mesmerized by him and really enjoyed spending time with him. Apparently he felt the same way about me, so we were very close for quite a while. Because he was so slender, I thought he didn't eat very much, and sometimes he didn't. But he had a very healthy appetite as well, and especially loved Thanksgiving type dinners...like chicken or turkey, mashed potatoes with gravy, veggies and salad. (KFC was also a great favorite.) Plus chocolate cake! He definitely had a sweet tooth, although he didn't overindulge in desserts. We didn't go out to dinner...that would not have worked, for obvious reasons. (In my opinion, there is such a thing as TOO much fame! He definitely had WAY too much, and it prevented him from living his life in a more normal fashion.) However, he took all that in stride, figuring it was the way things were and part of the hand he had been dealt. However, I worried about him incessantly, and cautioned him to be very careful with people. (They weren't going to be like his family, for example, or his musicians, or me). He was such a GOOD person, and would do anything for anyone, no matter who they were. This was all fine and good, but for him....it led to many problems, as everyone knows. He represented 'dollar signs' ($$$$) to many people, even some of his staff. I don't know how he was able to handle it all. But he did!! Such a brilliant person, he really had a beautiful mind. And he almost never complained. He did love performing, and the adulation of the crowd energized him. On stage he went into his own world and just 'did his thing.' It was a lot of fun to watch him from the wings...when I was there we used to go back to his hotel, order room service, and watch television!
The BAD Tour was the one in which he wanted me to be a participant and play keyboard with the other musicians (there were two other keyboard players....one of them was Greg Phillinganes, who had been with him for some time. Greg was and still is excellent.....he could play anything by ear! He wasn't a concert pianist, but that didn't matter.) The tour was slated to be very long, and I was reluctant to commit to such an extensive period of time. I had concerts scheduled, and didn't want to cancel them. He understood, but was disappointed and just a little annoyed, I think. Now when I look back, I wish I HAD gone with him. He wanted me to move into his house in Encino (Hayvenhurst, it is called) where he and his family lived....along with some exotic animals as well! I was a little apprehensive (not about the exotic animals, but being in a household with his dad), but Michael assured me that Joseph (as everyone called him) would leave me alone. That way I could rehearse with him and the other musicians, as well as practice my concert pieces. (I soon learned that when he had an idea, he visualized everything around it....all possibilities and contingencies.) He made it all sound so absolutely inviting and possible, that I really had a difficult time making a decision. His brothers had moved out by then, although the Jackson brothers were often at the house visiting. (They were all very close to their mother...none more than Michael.) His sisters LaToya and Janet still lived there....Rebbie had left the nest long ago to marry Nathaniel Brown. The house had been remodeled by Michael, and he owned the deed...and shared that with his mom so she would have something of her own. (I don't think I have ever met a man who was more devoted to his mother than Michael).
He had not yet purchased his Neverland Ranch, but it was in the works. He had big plans for that property....and drew up countless scenarios and maps. He talked constantly about it, as it was to be his 'forever' home. I could hardly wait for it to happen. He was building a zoo for all his animals, a theater (of course) which included 2 bedrooms (enclosed by glass windows) with hospital type beds for terminally ill children. Included on the property was to be a Disney-type theme park...with many wonderful rides (including a carousel...my favorite.) There was going to be a train which ran around the residential part of the property. He thought of everything....and sometimes would stop what he was doing, (working), and write something down...about that property. He brought all of his powerful imagination to bear upon the creation of this residence. The filming of "SAY SAY SAY" had been done on the property.... Paul McCartney and his wife had leased it for a brief time, and Michael was enchanted with it. When he shared his ideas with me it was like watching a magician create an illusion, because when he described something, one could actually SEE it.
At this time his skin color was still dark, although it had lightened considerably. When he performed, the perspiration on his face caused his makeup to run, and one could see the blotches on his skin. I know this really caused him misery, but he mostly tried to ignore it. Unfortunately, many didn't believe he had vitiligo (the skin disorder which causes the pigmentation of the skin to lose its color----white people, for example, become 'albinos') and thought he was trying to become 'white'. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Michael was an African American man with curly black hair who was proud of his heritage. It has always been mystifying to me why he was criticized so viciously for this....and other matters. He had no control over the color of his skin (any more than you or I do), and would have preferred (if possible) to remain a black American. It didn't matter to me WHAT color he was; he was just Michael to me. I told him that....he knew that I loved him as he was. Black, white, green, or somewhere in between!
One thing that really bothered him as a young teenager was the size of his nose. Apparently he had been teased about that as a kid. So he changed it one day....(this was before I knew him...he told me about it). He said he came home with bandages on his face, and his mother nearly fainted. Now why that should concern people is beyond me. Nearly every celebrity (as well as others) frequently have 'nose jobs.' I personally think he went a bit too far with that nose reduction business, but it WAS his nose. Why shouldn't he do what he wanted? He could certainly afford it! That was the only thing he did to his face, however. He didn't change his cheekbones, although he did have a cleft put in his chin. (He liked how that looked on Kirk Douglas!)
He could not understand the media's fascination with all those personal issues. What interested him was how someone's mind worked, what they thought, what they accomplished, etc. He was so far from being small-minded, interested in gossip, or what the tabloids offered. It bothered me so much to see what people actually wrote about him. Most of it was nonsense....fabricated lies, just to sell magazines or newspapers. I recall reading one of those terrible magazines and then throwing it on the floor! I was so irate! Michael just said....'don't worry about all that. I don't.' And then he threw the magazine away. That is how he was! It seemed to me that the press builds a person up one minute only to tear them down the next. That was what happened to him. He went from being the darling of the pop music world to being criticized for everything he did (and then some). I HATED it!!! (It was then that I remembered Mr. Balanchine telling me in the elevator in the New York State Theater not to put too much stock in any review I might get. I had just played in Alice Tully Hall and received a marvelous review. He said "if you believe the Good ones, then you have to believe the Bad. Best to believe nothing, and just do your work!" Wise man! I told Michael exactly what Mr. Balanchine had said to me...and he said the same thing..."he is right...you can only believe in yourself." Oh Boy! I learned something that day about Michael. What a strong character he was!
I recall that on the day he passed, I had to go to work at PNB....didn't want to....but had to. My eyes were all red and I couldn't stop crying. One of the girls asked me what was wrong, and I said, "Michael Jackson died yesterday, and I don't think I can handle it." Another girl said to me..."Dianne, I hope you are not TOO upset." Too upset? What is that anyway? I just looked at her and said, "I am more upset than you can possibly imagine." Of course, they didn't know what my history with him had been, so when anyone began to talk about him, I just quietly said that it would be better NOT to talk about him to me, especially if it is negative. So they all left me alone....which is what I wanted. Just being around people that day was too much! I went home that night and decided NOT to work the next day. I needed to be alone! (And as I write this, I can feel the tears begin.)
Michael loved music SO much....more than any other musician I have ever met. He could listen for hours! This is classical music I am talking about! He adored Tchaikovsky, Debussy, Ravel, and many other composers. One of his favorite pieces of music was NUTCRACKER!!! When he told me that, I laughed so hard! Of course, he didn't know that I had played Nutcracker at Christmas time for rehearsals for the ballet...and also played in the orchestra....(for years,) and practically knew the score by heart. When I told him that, he asked me to play some of it on the piano.....he had never heard NUTCRACKER played on the piano, only orchestral recordings. So of course, I obliged.....I happened to have the score at home! (I don't think anyone else could have persuaded me to play Nutcracker at home on the piano). He was absolutely transfixed by my adaptation of the score to the piano....and wanted me to keep playing! That day I played most of it for him....can you believe it? I still laugh to myself when I think of that day! He also adored AFTERNOON OF A FAUN by Debussy....plus some other music of Debussy. He asked me to play those pieces as well. And Ravel, and Bach. Which I did, of course. So I ended up playing a great deal of music for him on that occasion. He was an excellent audience! On one of those musical days, I asked him to sing BEN for me....and I accompanied him. I shall never forget that!
Sometimes he would get a faraway look in his eyes, and I would know that a song or some piece of music was coming to him. (And at times he would wake up with a piece of music already done in his head!) One of those times, I ran to get my staff paper and pencil, and asked him to sing the melody to me....and I wrote down what he sang instantly. He would have the entire piece in his head....the instrumentation, the lead vocals, the vocal harmonies, words, percussion....everything. His ability to sing every part into a tape machine is well-known (with the rhythm in there as well)....beat boxing, it is called.....but it was very fascinating to actually hear him do this. When he recorded a song, he would sing all the harmonies to his own vocals one by one....and remember ALL the others he had just recorded. This is NOT easy. All the vocals were absolutely spot on. He had perfect pitch...(the innate knowing of the pitches of all notes). I have this ability as well......it is not so common. Many musicians do NOT have this particular talent. It is a huge asset in performing, and is very helpful in taking musical dictation. I have to say here that he was like a water tap....when the tap was turned on, music just poured out. Every day I learned something new about him.
When I watch performances of Michael's now, and hear how many speak about him, I am once again reminded of his actual being. I always had a slight problem reconciling the REAL person with the huge star and performer that he was. In fact, I almost never thought about how famous he was during our relationship. It just didn't come up. [That is how it is with anyone whom you know personally, and who happens to be a world renowned artist. George Balanchine comes to mind...who was the Director and Chief Choreographer for the New York City Ballet (and my 'boss.'), Jerry (Jerome) Robbins one of the world's foremost choreographers...and creator of West Side Story, Rudolph (Rudi) Nureyev... who was the most famous ballet dancer of our time, etc. They all worked hard at their craft, as did I...and we all worked together.] It was the same with Mike...he worked extremely hard at his craft...and often recorded a song 20 + times to get it 'right.' He also would 'run through' his shows (on non-performance days) at least twice. He would do all his numbers 'full-out'...and expected the others to do the same. Michael didn't act like a big star in these instances....he behaved as if he had not yet reached that pinnacle! He believed in rehearsing, that was for sure....he knew that repetition was the key to a perfect or near-perfect performance. (That was how he was raised...he learned all this as a child. Work, work, work!!!) When dancers I know complain of constant rehearsals, I want to tell them about Michael...no one ever worked harder than he did. He wasn't conscious of the effect he had on people, in fact he was quite shy. I believe he appreciated that I didn't fall to the floor in a dead faint, whenever I was around him! When I read what people, especially women write about him, I laugh to myself. It seems so silly to be ga-ga over anybody...star or not...that is my feeling anyway. Michael was a man....a real one, with bona fide feelings and issues. He was not perfect, but was nearer to perfection than most.
He had a fabulous sense of humor, and laughed easily, sometimes with a wicked cackle. (That always made me laugh!) Sometimes he could be very silly, but it was always fun! And he loved to tease....I recall the time when he chased me around with a spider (quite a large one) in a little box. (He, of course, was not afraid of any insect, snake, or animal). I screamed and tried to get away, but he caught me...(he was faster), and put the spider on my hand. Ugh!!! I didn't like that much, but he thought it was hysterically funny! (My own brother used to do that to me...I detested spiders.)
Michael was always drawn to spiritual issues and wrote a great deal about such matters. His book, DANCING THE DREAM is a case in point. I have been reading that book again, and marvel at how his words could clarify and elucidate. I am including a short poem here:
BREAKING FREE
All t1his hysteria, all this commotion
Time, space, energy are just a notion
What we have conceptualized we have created
All those loved, all those hated.
Where is the beginning, where's the end
Time's arrow, so difficult to bend
Those broken promises, what they meant
Those love letters, never sent.
He wrote a great deal about the planet....and composed the song: EARTH SONG.....begging people to be mindful of the damage before it is too late. (This was one of his last performances (DR) in the Staples Center near the end of his life.) He spoke to the entire cast....saying that "we had 4 years to get it right before it is too late." That was in 2009....and now it is nearly 5 years later.....is it too late? Considering the past winter in all parts of the world, I wonder. Michael was a visionary....and he could see what most could NOT. He also wrote, "we've been treating Mother Earth the way some people treat a rental apartment. Just trash it and move on." AND "we have to heal our wounded world. The chaos, despair, and senseless destruction we see today are a result of the alienation that people feel from each other and their environment. Often this alienation has its roots in an emotionally deprived childhood. Children have had their childhood stolen from them. A child's mind needs the nourishment of mystery, magic, wonder, and excitement. I want my work to help people rediscover the the child that's hiding in them."
He also wrote about God, Love, Ecstasy, Trust, Magic. "My idea of magic doesn't have much to do with stage tricks and illusions. The whole world abounds in magic...." And he wrote about Animals (there is an especially lovely story about a baby seal), Elephants (he loved elephants), Heaven, Angels, Stars, Music and Dance.
HOW I MAKE MUSIC
"People ask me how I make music. I tell them I just step into it. It's like stepping into a river and joining the flow. Every moment in the river has its song. So I stay in the moment and listen. What I hear is never the same. A walk through the woods brings a light, crackling song: Leaves rustle in the wind, birds chatter, and squirrels scold, twigs crunch underfoot, and the beat of my heart holds it all together. When you join the flow, the music is inside and outside, and both are the same. As long as I can listen to the moment, I'll always have music."
I am very sure that wherever he is now, he has music....and is no doubt composing. While writing this, I am listening to the latest CD release.....XSCAPE, which is wonderful. And I watched the documentary of L.A. Reid, Rodney Jerkins, and the others who worked on this CD. (Rodney said he had dreamed that he would work with Michael, before he met him. And that came true). He told Michael....and MJ said..."dreams almost always come true." The day before he passed, I dreamed of it. That was NOT a nice dream....and it came true. I feel very close to him...and not a day goes by when I don't think about him. His humanitarian instincts AND actions seemed to know no bounds. That generous and lovely man was like NO other, and I miss him dreadfully. When someone says anything negative about him, I really have to restrain myself. I think the look on my face is enough to stop further remarks....scowling seems to work! It is gratifying that this new CD has been released. Michael would have wanted that....he was anxious for his work to be heard...and preserved, and he was so prolific. (like a water tap, as I said before). He wrote many, many songs for each of his albums so there would be a large choice....and only a fraction of them were used, for whatever reason. I do know that he was headed in a classical direction....(with a beat)....and he wanted to study music in a more formal way....learning music theory, formalization of composition, anatomy of music, which composers did what and why, etc. I could have helped him with all of that. (Not that he needed it...but he wanted to KNOW.) I wanted him to compose some music for me to play on the piano, in a concert. Although he hadn't gotten around to it, I knew that something was germinating in his brain, because when I asked him about it on the phone, he just laughed and said..."all in good time, girl, all in good time." Well, it is about time now....I do think! Maybe something will come drifting down! One never knows!!!
Really, really
How will I ever know the answer
To that question....
Inside my mind
Within my heart
There exists no
'Cease'
No grasping the concept of
'I am done.'
And yet
If God breathes this word,
'STOP'
On me
I will accept this from Him
I will be content in Him
I will be finished.
But.....considering my history
Taking into account my motivation
Understanding the power of my inspiration
I would expect that
You would never be finished
Receiving
Because I will never be finished
Creating
Only time will tell
Only God's time will tell.
(An excerpt from the full poem....written by
Michael Jackson. (c) 5/10/10 Rosalynn Smith)
Ros gave me this excerpt a few years ago when she learned of my friendship with Michael. I am including it here as well as another poem she recently received from him, and posted on Facebook. For those who are fans of Michael's, see below:
NO MATTER WHEN I AM AWAKE
Nor even when I cannot sleep,
I am never alone.
Desolate though my mind may feel,
My heart knows knows nothing of that care.
In my every moment
I am connected with
Others also not asleep
Others in whom
My essence is immersed
My needs attended to
Others who
Even not knowing their names
Even not seeing their faces -
Though their faces are in my mind's eye
Though their names are written on my heart -
Others whom I love unconditionally
Who love me equally
First and also in return.
I am blanketed in this affection.
For I am not a citizen of some place
I am a child of the world.
In sleeplessness
I turn to them -
My companions
Whom neither distance nor unawareness
Can separate from me -
I seek them out
In delight and in sorrow
In delight and in fear
In wonder and in doubt
They never fail me -
Never have
Never will -
And this
I pray they know.
Across eons and light years of time
Through burdens inconceivable to bear
Midst bliss indestructible -
In this earthbound reality
They are my only constant
Not even heaven deigns to intervene
For we transcended
Familiar conventions
We transcend, still
In our now,
For some while, separate
Realms.
Celebrations rise up for us,
There and here
Because
We bring delight and comfort
We offer comfort and hope
Our voices sing of opportunity
Our bodies move
In the dance of possibility
We confirm love
Beyond ourselves.
Unremarkable as we should be
We are, instead, exquisitely unique.
Through all the years there was of me,
This never changed
Except, perhaps, to grow
In number
In strength
In sincerity
You never changed
Towards me.
And I,
Therefore
Never knew the pain
Your absence would have been.
You are incomparable gifts
To my heart
To my life
To the fullness of my purpose.
This is the definition of
You for me:
Blessing given
Hope fulfilled
Joy eternal
Love requited.
Sleep now
Sweet angels there below
In peace we meet
In purpose revel
No matter that I wake or sleep
I know your constant presence
So I am not,
Not ever....
Alone.
Rosalynn Smith (c)2014
Michael's beautiful writing ability was not known to many.....except, of course, as it applied to his song lyrics. Somehow it just did not occur to people that his prose or poetry was from the same well as his lyrics! When I would tell anyone how wonderful his writing was, they were always surprised. Why? He was, in fact, a multi-gifted, multi-faceted individual who was a total Renaissance Man, as it were. Of course, those who worked with him realized he could sing, dance, write music, create shows, act, and etc. He also could paint and draw very well (many of his paintings were discovered after his death in a huge storage facility...at an airport which wasn't used much. He was also very athletic....and had he chosen to do so, could have been an ace runner, tennis pro, etc. He could DO just about everything, including cook! I cannot speak for others, only myself. From the onset I was very impressed by his abilities in music and dance; and although I have considerable ability in the field of music (being a professional musician and performer), I was stunned by how much he knew about music....and he was never FORMALLY schooled! He had a phenomenal ear and could hear the smallest errors on stage, WHILE performing himself. He really blew me away! I have worked with dancers all my life (as piano soloist with the NEW YORK CITY BALLET, PACIFIC NORTHWEST BALLET (in Seattle), and THE ZURICH COMPANY in Switzerland....so am very conversant with dance, particularly classical ballet and the Balanchine repertoire. I ALWAYS knew exactly how steps were connected to the music, and this particular ability led to my work with George Balanchine, Jerome Robbins, Rudi (Rudolph) Nureyev, etc. And my ability to sightread music easily was a handy little tool! I never thought much about it....it was easy for me, so I took it for granted. I remember remarking to Michael how his ability to pick up choreography at the drop of a hat, fascinated me. He looked at me in surprise, saying "well, Dianne, it is just how you can look at a piece of music and instantly play it! That really blows my mind!" Of course, he did not have a real appreciation of how quickly he did learn dance steps.....(I really wish he could have worked with a choreographer like Jerry Robbins, for example, whose works he could have danced wonderfully, I am sure. He hadn't trained to be a ballet dancer, and did not want to have the muscular thighs that most male dancers acquire via their training). No. Michael wanted the long lean look, so he trained for that type of musculature. When I watched him work, I always wondered which part of his brain he was using for dance, and which part for music. (I actually wished I could see inside that brain of his!). Because he was definitely a mixture of the two. I have to say I was totally mesmerized by him and really enjoyed spending time with him. Apparently he felt the same way about me, so we were very close for quite a while. Because he was so slender, I thought he didn't eat very much, and sometimes he didn't. But he had a very healthy appetite as well, and especially loved Thanksgiving type dinners...like chicken or turkey, mashed potatoes with gravy, veggies and salad. (KFC was also a great favorite.) Plus chocolate cake! He definitely had a sweet tooth, although he didn't overindulge in desserts. We didn't go out to dinner...that would not have worked, for obvious reasons. (In my opinion, there is such a thing as TOO much fame! He definitely had WAY too much, and it prevented him from living his life in a more normal fashion.) However, he took all that in stride, figuring it was the way things were and part of the hand he had been dealt. However, I worried about him incessantly, and cautioned him to be very careful with people. (They weren't going to be like his family, for example, or his musicians, or me). He was such a GOOD person, and would do anything for anyone, no matter who they were. This was all fine and good, but for him....it led to many problems, as everyone knows. He represented 'dollar signs' ($$$$) to many people, even some of his staff. I don't know how he was able to handle it all. But he did!! Such a brilliant person, he really had a beautiful mind. And he almost never complained. He did love performing, and the adulation of the crowd energized him. On stage he went into his own world and just 'did his thing.' It was a lot of fun to watch him from the wings...when I was there we used to go back to his hotel, order room service, and watch television!
The BAD Tour was the one in which he wanted me to be a participant and play keyboard with the other musicians (there were two other keyboard players....one of them was Greg Phillinganes, who had been with him for some time. Greg was and still is excellent.....he could play anything by ear! He wasn't a concert pianist, but that didn't matter.) The tour was slated to be very long, and I was reluctant to commit to such an extensive period of time. I had concerts scheduled, and didn't want to cancel them. He understood, but was disappointed and just a little annoyed, I think. Now when I look back, I wish I HAD gone with him. He wanted me to move into his house in Encino (Hayvenhurst, it is called) where he and his family lived....along with some exotic animals as well! I was a little apprehensive (not about the exotic animals, but being in a household with his dad), but Michael assured me that Joseph (as everyone called him) would leave me alone. That way I could rehearse with him and the other musicians, as well as practice my concert pieces. (I soon learned that when he had an idea, he visualized everything around it....all possibilities and contingencies.) He made it all sound so absolutely inviting and possible, that I really had a difficult time making a decision. His brothers had moved out by then, although the Jackson brothers were often at the house visiting. (They were all very close to their mother...none more than Michael.) His sisters LaToya and Janet still lived there....Rebbie had left the nest long ago to marry Nathaniel Brown. The house had been remodeled by Michael, and he owned the deed...and shared that with his mom so she would have something of her own. (I don't think I have ever met a man who was more devoted to his mother than Michael).
He had not yet purchased his Neverland Ranch, but it was in the works. He had big plans for that property....and drew up countless scenarios and maps. He talked constantly about it, as it was to be his 'forever' home. I could hardly wait for it to happen. He was building a zoo for all his animals, a theater (of course) which included 2 bedrooms (enclosed by glass windows) with hospital type beds for terminally ill children. Included on the property was to be a Disney-type theme park...with many wonderful rides (including a carousel...my favorite.) There was going to be a train which ran around the residential part of the property. He thought of everything....and sometimes would stop what he was doing, (working), and write something down...about that property. He brought all of his powerful imagination to bear upon the creation of this residence. The filming of "SAY SAY SAY" had been done on the property.... Paul McCartney and his wife had leased it for a brief time, and Michael was enchanted with it. When he shared his ideas with me it was like watching a magician create an illusion, because when he described something, one could actually SEE it.
At this time his skin color was still dark, although it had lightened considerably. When he performed, the perspiration on his face caused his makeup to run, and one could see the blotches on his skin. I know this really caused him misery, but he mostly tried to ignore it. Unfortunately, many didn't believe he had vitiligo (the skin disorder which causes the pigmentation of the skin to lose its color----white people, for example, become 'albinos') and thought he was trying to become 'white'. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Michael was an African American man with curly black hair who was proud of his heritage. It has always been mystifying to me why he was criticized so viciously for this....and other matters. He had no control over the color of his skin (any more than you or I do), and would have preferred (if possible) to remain a black American. It didn't matter to me WHAT color he was; he was just Michael to me. I told him that....he knew that I loved him as he was. Black, white, green, or somewhere in between!
One thing that really bothered him as a young teenager was the size of his nose. Apparently he had been teased about that as a kid. So he changed it one day....(this was before I knew him...he told me about it). He said he came home with bandages on his face, and his mother nearly fainted. Now why that should concern people is beyond me. Nearly every celebrity (as well as others) frequently have 'nose jobs.' I personally think he went a bit too far with that nose reduction business, but it WAS his nose. Why shouldn't he do what he wanted? He could certainly afford it! That was the only thing he did to his face, however. He didn't change his cheekbones, although he did have a cleft put in his chin. (He liked how that looked on Kirk Douglas!)
He could not understand the media's fascination with all those personal issues. What interested him was how someone's mind worked, what they thought, what they accomplished, etc. He was so far from being small-minded, interested in gossip, or what the tabloids offered. It bothered me so much to see what people actually wrote about him. Most of it was nonsense....fabricated lies, just to sell magazines or newspapers. I recall reading one of those terrible magazines and then throwing it on the floor! I was so irate! Michael just said....'don't worry about all that. I don't.' And then he threw the magazine away. That is how he was! It seemed to me that the press builds a person up one minute only to tear them down the next. That was what happened to him. He went from being the darling of the pop music world to being criticized for everything he did (and then some). I HATED it!!! (It was then that I remembered Mr. Balanchine telling me in the elevator in the New York State Theater not to put too much stock in any review I might get. I had just played in Alice Tully Hall and received a marvelous review. He said "if you believe the Good ones, then you have to believe the Bad. Best to believe nothing, and just do your work!" Wise man! I told Michael exactly what Mr. Balanchine had said to me...and he said the same thing..."he is right...you can only believe in yourself." Oh Boy! I learned something that day about Michael. What a strong character he was!
I recall that on the day he passed, I had to go to work at PNB....didn't want to....but had to. My eyes were all red and I couldn't stop crying. One of the girls asked me what was wrong, and I said, "Michael Jackson died yesterday, and I don't think I can handle it." Another girl said to me..."Dianne, I hope you are not TOO upset." Too upset? What is that anyway? I just looked at her and said, "I am more upset than you can possibly imagine." Of course, they didn't know what my history with him had been, so when anyone began to talk about him, I just quietly said that it would be better NOT to talk about him to me, especially if it is negative. So they all left me alone....which is what I wanted. Just being around people that day was too much! I went home that night and decided NOT to work the next day. I needed to be alone! (And as I write this, I can feel the tears begin.)
Michael loved music SO much....more than any other musician I have ever met. He could listen for hours! This is classical music I am talking about! He adored Tchaikovsky, Debussy, Ravel, and many other composers. One of his favorite pieces of music was NUTCRACKER!!! When he told me that, I laughed so hard! Of course, he didn't know that I had played Nutcracker at Christmas time for rehearsals for the ballet...and also played in the orchestra....(for years,) and practically knew the score by heart. When I told him that, he asked me to play some of it on the piano.....he had never heard NUTCRACKER played on the piano, only orchestral recordings. So of course, I obliged.....I happened to have the score at home! (I don't think anyone else could have persuaded me to play Nutcracker at home on the piano). He was absolutely transfixed by my adaptation of the score to the piano....and wanted me to keep playing! That day I played most of it for him....can you believe it? I still laugh to myself when I think of that day! He also adored AFTERNOON OF A FAUN by Debussy....plus some other music of Debussy. He asked me to play those pieces as well. And Ravel, and Bach. Which I did, of course. So I ended up playing a great deal of music for him on that occasion. He was an excellent audience! On one of those musical days, I asked him to sing BEN for me....and I accompanied him. I shall never forget that!
Sometimes he would get a faraway look in his eyes, and I would know that a song or some piece of music was coming to him. (And at times he would wake up with a piece of music already done in his head!) One of those times, I ran to get my staff paper and pencil, and asked him to sing the melody to me....and I wrote down what he sang instantly. He would have the entire piece in his head....the instrumentation, the lead vocals, the vocal harmonies, words, percussion....everything. His ability to sing every part into a tape machine is well-known (with the rhythm in there as well)....beat boxing, it is called.....but it was very fascinating to actually hear him do this. When he recorded a song, he would sing all the harmonies to his own vocals one by one....and remember ALL the others he had just recorded. This is NOT easy. All the vocals were absolutely spot on. He had perfect pitch...(the innate knowing of the pitches of all notes). I have this ability as well......it is not so common. Many musicians do NOT have this particular talent. It is a huge asset in performing, and is very helpful in taking musical dictation. I have to say here that he was like a water tap....when the tap was turned on, music just poured out. Every day I learned something new about him.
When I watch performances of Michael's now, and hear how many speak about him, I am once again reminded of his actual being. I always had a slight problem reconciling the REAL person with the huge star and performer that he was. In fact, I almost never thought about how famous he was during our relationship. It just didn't come up. [That is how it is with anyone whom you know personally, and who happens to be a world renowned artist. George Balanchine comes to mind...who was the Director and Chief Choreographer for the New York City Ballet (and my 'boss.'), Jerry (Jerome) Robbins one of the world's foremost choreographers...and creator of West Side Story, Rudolph (Rudi) Nureyev... who was the most famous ballet dancer of our time, etc. They all worked hard at their craft, as did I...and we all worked together.] It was the same with Mike...he worked extremely hard at his craft...and often recorded a song 20 + times to get it 'right.' He also would 'run through' his shows (on non-performance days) at least twice. He would do all his numbers 'full-out'...and expected the others to do the same. Michael didn't act like a big star in these instances....he behaved as if he had not yet reached that pinnacle! He believed in rehearsing, that was for sure....he knew that repetition was the key to a perfect or near-perfect performance. (That was how he was raised...he learned all this as a child. Work, work, work!!!) When dancers I know complain of constant rehearsals, I want to tell them about Michael...no one ever worked harder than he did. He wasn't conscious of the effect he had on people, in fact he was quite shy. I believe he appreciated that I didn't fall to the floor in a dead faint, whenever I was around him! When I read what people, especially women write about him, I laugh to myself. It seems so silly to be ga-ga over anybody...star or not...that is my feeling anyway. Michael was a man....a real one, with bona fide feelings and issues. He was not perfect, but was nearer to perfection than most.
He had a fabulous sense of humor, and laughed easily, sometimes with a wicked cackle. (That always made me laugh!) Sometimes he could be very silly, but it was always fun! And he loved to tease....I recall the time when he chased me around with a spider (quite a large one) in a little box. (He, of course, was not afraid of any insect, snake, or animal). I screamed and tried to get away, but he caught me...(he was faster), and put the spider on my hand. Ugh!!! I didn't like that much, but he thought it was hysterically funny! (My own brother used to do that to me...I detested spiders.)
Michael was always drawn to spiritual issues and wrote a great deal about such matters. His book, DANCING THE DREAM is a case in point. I have been reading that book again, and marvel at how his words could clarify and elucidate. I am including a short poem here:
BREAKING FREE
All t1his hysteria, all this commotion
Time, space, energy are just a notion
What we have conceptualized we have created
All those loved, all those hated.
Where is the beginning, where's the end
Time's arrow, so difficult to bend
Those broken promises, what they meant
Those love letters, never sent.
He wrote a great deal about the planet....and composed the song: EARTH SONG.....begging people to be mindful of the damage before it is too late. (This was one of his last performances (DR) in the Staples Center near the end of his life.) He spoke to the entire cast....saying that "we had 4 years to get it right before it is too late." That was in 2009....and now it is nearly 5 years later.....is it too late? Considering the past winter in all parts of the world, I wonder. Michael was a visionary....and he could see what most could NOT. He also wrote, "we've been treating Mother Earth the way some people treat a rental apartment. Just trash it and move on." AND "we have to heal our wounded world. The chaos, despair, and senseless destruction we see today are a result of the alienation that people feel from each other and their environment. Often this alienation has its roots in an emotionally deprived childhood. Children have had their childhood stolen from them. A child's mind needs the nourishment of mystery, magic, wonder, and excitement. I want my work to help people rediscover the the child that's hiding in them."
He also wrote about God, Love, Ecstasy, Trust, Magic. "My idea of magic doesn't have much to do with stage tricks and illusions. The whole world abounds in magic...." And he wrote about Animals (there is an especially lovely story about a baby seal), Elephants (he loved elephants), Heaven, Angels, Stars, Music and Dance.
HOW I MAKE MUSIC
"People ask me how I make music. I tell them I just step into it. It's like stepping into a river and joining the flow. Every moment in the river has its song. So I stay in the moment and listen. What I hear is never the same. A walk through the woods brings a light, crackling song: Leaves rustle in the wind, birds chatter, and squirrels scold, twigs crunch underfoot, and the beat of my heart holds it all together. When you join the flow, the music is inside and outside, and both are the same. As long as I can listen to the moment, I'll always have music."
I am very sure that wherever he is now, he has music....and is no doubt composing. While writing this, I am listening to the latest CD release.....XSCAPE, which is wonderful. And I watched the documentary of L.A. Reid, Rodney Jerkins, and the others who worked on this CD. (Rodney said he had dreamed that he would work with Michael, before he met him. And that came true). He told Michael....and MJ said..."dreams almost always come true." The day before he passed, I dreamed of it. That was NOT a nice dream....and it came true. I feel very close to him...and not a day goes by when I don't think about him. His humanitarian instincts AND actions seemed to know no bounds. That generous and lovely man was like NO other, and I miss him dreadfully. When someone says anything negative about him, I really have to restrain myself. I think the look on my face is enough to stop further remarks....scowling seems to work! It is gratifying that this new CD has been released. Michael would have wanted that....he was anxious for his work to be heard...and preserved, and he was so prolific. (like a water tap, as I said before). He wrote many, many songs for each of his albums so there would be a large choice....and only a fraction of them were used, for whatever reason. I do know that he was headed in a classical direction....(with a beat)....and he wanted to study music in a more formal way....learning music theory, formalization of composition, anatomy of music, which composers did what and why, etc. I could have helped him with all of that. (Not that he needed it...but he wanted to KNOW.) I wanted him to compose some music for me to play on the piano, in a concert. Although he hadn't gotten around to it, I knew that something was germinating in his brain, because when I asked him about it on the phone, he just laughed and said..."all in good time, girl, all in good time." Well, it is about time now....I do think! Maybe something will come drifting down! One never knows!!!
Friday, May 2, 2014
FURTHER STORIES AND ADVENTURES WITH THE NYCB (Chapter 21)
The following stories are from my memory of events, rehearsals, and trips...such as the filming in Berlin of many of Mr. Balanchine's ballets. I shall begin with that particular event...in 1973.
We were transported to Berlin, Germany, having rehearsed all the ballets to be filmed in New York City. I remember there were many rehearsals, and very long days in preparation for this. I was scheduled to be on various sets for many of the works, and additionally would be filmed in LIEBESLIEDER WALZER as well. Therefore, my beautiful dress was packed along with the costumes in the wardrobe trunks. However, my duo-partner, (Gordon Boelzner) and I were required to record the music IN BERLIN ahead of time for the filming. Thus we left a few days early to do this. At this time Gordon and I were getting along very well....and as I had not yet played a major concert in New York City, while working for the company...he had no issue with me. We arrived in Berlin, checked into our hotel, which was nice and very clean. Since the next day was the beginning of the recording session, I went to bed early, in order to be alert and energetic. Neither of us had any idea about the quality of the singers that would be recording these songs with us. (It would have been nice if we could have selected them ourselves, but somehow that wasn't part of the plan.....BIG MISTAKE!) We left the hotel quite early and were transported by taxi to the recording studio, which turned out to be in East Berlin. I have to mention here that the difference between East and West Berlin was astounding. I could not believe the dismal and depressing landscape of the Eastern half of the city....much of it was destroyed. (During one outing we all took a tour to East Berlin and attended a show there....I will tell that story a bit later.) Anyway we began by rehearsing the songs....and discovered that while 3 of the singers were proficient, the 4th one (a bass) was not up to par. It took a bit of time for him to rise to the occasion, so to speak. He seemed not to notice repeat signs, for one thing. Therefore, we decided to rehearse one song at a time, and then record it immediately. This process seemed to work well....as the singers wouldn't have to remember musical details for long! Some songs took longer than others, of course. It was a very tedious process, as recording often is, and we wanted the final result to be as perfect as possible. The first recording session lasted all day....some 12 hours. Both of us were exhausted after that day, not to mention jet lag. The next day was much the same, although that same bass constantly made mistakes, making it necessary to repeat and repeat his particular songs. (Why can't singers read music anyway? I have always wondered this. Not ALL singers, of course, but many.) We had to edit the tapes after all recording was finished, which took several hours. I could see this was going to be no easy matter. One of the producers dropped in on the recording session to see how we were progressing. I told him about the one singer who had slowed down the entire process. I thought he should know that whoever had chosen the singers had made a grave error. He just told me to do the best we could....ha! What a wonderful piece of advice that was! As if we wouldn't do the best we could. (We were professionals, those singers were NOT!)
The next day rehearsals began for several ballets on various sets. LIEBESLIEDER was not scheduled for filming until the following week, so I was free to work on other works with Rosemary and Mr. B: namely, STARS AND STRIPES, CONCERTO BAROCCO, and SYMPHONY IN C. While I don't remember the exact order of the filming, I do recall the long hours. The German producers were watching rehearsals and told the boys to jump VERY high, indicating with their arms exactly HOW high!
During one lunch break I walked outside to view the sights....and noticed a tall storage tank tower. I asked one of the producers what that was, and he told me! It was a GAS storage tank used for the extermination of all those poor people during World War II all those years ago. And it was still here! This site was one of the main camps where that happened, and here we were filming ballets! I was so appalled and horrified that I immediately went inside to avoid looking at that tower!
The scheduling for LIEBESLIEDER went up...we were to rehearse the ballet the next day, and then begin filming on the following day. We were scheduled to report for makeup on that day.....(8 dancers, 4 singers, 2 pianists) in one of the tents. I reported very early, and have photos of my make-up sessions as well as Gordon's. As there were a total of 14 people to be made up, the process took a while. Our filming didn't start until after lunch, and by then we were really ready to begin! Even though the music had been pre-recorded, Gordon and I played along with the tape. It is hard to fake playing the piano, without actually doing it. At one point, two of the dancers asked us to play a certain section a bit faster! We just looked at them and said that the music is recorded....this is it! We cannot change the tempo! I was laughing, and so were the others. I guess we were very convincing with our acting (playing). Funny!
We were scheduled to be in Berlin for 6 weeks to accomplish the filming.....so there were a number of 'outings' arranged for us. One of these was a trip to East Berlin to see an opera. I was very interested in this, although many were not. I vaguely remember the opera was CARMEN....which has so many familiar and beautiful arias. With these melodies floating through my head, I was cheerfully looking forward to this excursion.
We were taken by bus to the theater in East Berlin. I had heard so much about the BERLIN WALL, and here it was! (We were told NOT to take pictures of this piece of history)...just like in the Soviet Union.) We were also instructed not to make any trouble or cause problems as the USA had no official jurisdiction there..(in case someone was arrested!) East Berlin was just plain depressing, much like the area surrounding the recording studio). The theater was NOT lovely, but very utilitarian looking. There was coffee for sale in paper cups, which wasn't too bad and some odd soft drinks. I opted for the coffee and a strange cookie. THEN we learned that the opera we thought was being offered, had been changed the day before. The new performance was ANATEVKA (Fiddler on the Roof)!! As you may know, this production was choreographed and directed by Jerry Robbins!!! Of course we stayed and watched the performance...we were, obviously, already there! Mr. Balanchine was most amused when he found that we had all been treated to a Jerry Robbins show! Ha! I had seen many of Jerry's Broadway productions...he was definitely a genius in this area. The fact that he had transitioned into classical dance was (when I think about it) nothing short of amazing! A multi-talented individual....he never stopped creating dance of some sort. Although he could be very difficult at times....well, what can one say? He had his demons, but I respected him immensely. Mr. B used to make a little joke involving Jerry....he would say to the dancers, "you better behave, or I'll send Jerry in here!" That usually did the trick! Oddly enough, after I put my foot down regarding his treatment of me, we became good friends. I was invited to many parties at his home on the East side. He knew everyone, and I remember meeting Liza Minelli there on one occasion. Of course, Lenny (Bernstein) was often present as well. Most of these people attended my Tully Hall Concert...Jerry brought many of his friends! That was the milieu in which I lived and worked.
When the filming finished, we all breathed a sigh of relief. It had been a difficult process, and sometimes things got a bit heated. I remember that in NYC the LIEBESLIEDER WALZER film was actually shown in a movie theater on Broadway in the 70's (think it was the Embassy Theater)....and several of us went to see it! How much fun it was to see ourselves on the big screen! There were many close-ups of my hands and face, as well as everyone else's. I had always wanted to be in film...and voila! Here it was!
We were transported to Berlin, Germany, having rehearsed all the ballets to be filmed in New York City. I remember there were many rehearsals, and very long days in preparation for this. I was scheduled to be on various sets for many of the works, and additionally would be filmed in LIEBESLIEDER WALZER as well. Therefore, my beautiful dress was packed along with the costumes in the wardrobe trunks. However, my duo-partner, (Gordon Boelzner) and I were required to record the music IN BERLIN ahead of time for the filming. Thus we left a few days early to do this. At this time Gordon and I were getting along very well....and as I had not yet played a major concert in New York City, while working for the company...he had no issue with me. We arrived in Berlin, checked into our hotel, which was nice and very clean. Since the next day was the beginning of the recording session, I went to bed early, in order to be alert and energetic. Neither of us had any idea about the quality of the singers that would be recording these songs with us. (It would have been nice if we could have selected them ourselves, but somehow that wasn't part of the plan.....BIG MISTAKE!) We left the hotel quite early and were transported by taxi to the recording studio, which turned out to be in East Berlin. I have to mention here that the difference between East and West Berlin was astounding. I could not believe the dismal and depressing landscape of the Eastern half of the city....much of it was destroyed. (During one outing we all took a tour to East Berlin and attended a show there....I will tell that story a bit later.) Anyway we began by rehearsing the songs....and discovered that while 3 of the singers were proficient, the 4th one (a bass) was not up to par. It took a bit of time for him to rise to the occasion, so to speak. He seemed not to notice repeat signs, for one thing. Therefore, we decided to rehearse one song at a time, and then record it immediately. This process seemed to work well....as the singers wouldn't have to remember musical details for long! Some songs took longer than others, of course. It was a very tedious process, as recording often is, and we wanted the final result to be as perfect as possible. The first recording session lasted all day....some 12 hours. Both of us were exhausted after that day, not to mention jet lag. The next day was much the same, although that same bass constantly made mistakes, making it necessary to repeat and repeat his particular songs. (Why can't singers read music anyway? I have always wondered this. Not ALL singers, of course, but many.) We had to edit the tapes after all recording was finished, which took several hours. I could see this was going to be no easy matter. One of the producers dropped in on the recording session to see how we were progressing. I told him about the one singer who had slowed down the entire process. I thought he should know that whoever had chosen the singers had made a grave error. He just told me to do the best we could....ha! What a wonderful piece of advice that was! As if we wouldn't do the best we could. (We were professionals, those singers were NOT!)
The next day rehearsals began for several ballets on various sets. LIEBESLIEDER was not scheduled for filming until the following week, so I was free to work on other works with Rosemary and Mr. B: namely, STARS AND STRIPES, CONCERTO BAROCCO, and SYMPHONY IN C. While I don't remember the exact order of the filming, I do recall the long hours. The German producers were watching rehearsals and told the boys to jump VERY high, indicating with their arms exactly HOW high!
During one lunch break I walked outside to view the sights....and noticed a tall storage tank tower. I asked one of the producers what that was, and he told me! It was a GAS storage tank used for the extermination of all those poor people during World War II all those years ago. And it was still here! This site was one of the main camps where that happened, and here we were filming ballets! I was so appalled and horrified that I immediately went inside to avoid looking at that tower!
The scheduling for LIEBESLIEDER went up...we were to rehearse the ballet the next day, and then begin filming on the following day. We were scheduled to report for makeup on that day.....(8 dancers, 4 singers, 2 pianists) in one of the tents. I reported very early, and have photos of my make-up sessions as well as Gordon's. As there were a total of 14 people to be made up, the process took a while. Our filming didn't start until after lunch, and by then we were really ready to begin! Even though the music had been pre-recorded, Gordon and I played along with the tape. It is hard to fake playing the piano, without actually doing it. At one point, two of the dancers asked us to play a certain section a bit faster! We just looked at them and said that the music is recorded....this is it! We cannot change the tempo! I was laughing, and so were the others. I guess we were very convincing with our acting (playing). Funny!
We were scheduled to be in Berlin for 6 weeks to accomplish the filming.....so there were a number of 'outings' arranged for us. One of these was a trip to East Berlin to see an opera. I was very interested in this, although many were not. I vaguely remember the opera was CARMEN....which has so many familiar and beautiful arias. With these melodies floating through my head, I was cheerfully looking forward to this excursion.
We were taken by bus to the theater in East Berlin. I had heard so much about the BERLIN WALL, and here it was! (We were told NOT to take pictures of this piece of history)...just like in the Soviet Union.) We were also instructed not to make any trouble or cause problems as the USA had no official jurisdiction there..(in case someone was arrested!) East Berlin was just plain depressing, much like the area surrounding the recording studio). The theater was NOT lovely, but very utilitarian looking. There was coffee for sale in paper cups, which wasn't too bad and some odd soft drinks. I opted for the coffee and a strange cookie. THEN we learned that the opera we thought was being offered, had been changed the day before. The new performance was ANATEVKA (Fiddler on the Roof)!! As you may know, this production was choreographed and directed by Jerry Robbins!!! Of course we stayed and watched the performance...we were, obviously, already there! Mr. Balanchine was most amused when he found that we had all been treated to a Jerry Robbins show! Ha! I had seen many of Jerry's Broadway productions...he was definitely a genius in this area. The fact that he had transitioned into classical dance was (when I think about it) nothing short of amazing! A multi-talented individual....he never stopped creating dance of some sort. Although he could be very difficult at times....well, what can one say? He had his demons, but I respected him immensely. Mr. B used to make a little joke involving Jerry....he would say to the dancers, "you better behave, or I'll send Jerry in here!" That usually did the trick! Oddly enough, after I put my foot down regarding his treatment of me, we became good friends. I was invited to many parties at his home on the East side. He knew everyone, and I remember meeting Liza Minelli there on one occasion. Of course, Lenny (Bernstein) was often present as well. Most of these people attended my Tully Hall Concert...Jerry brought many of his friends! That was the milieu in which I lived and worked.
When the filming finished, we all breathed a sigh of relief. It had been a difficult process, and sometimes things got a bit heated. I remember that in NYC the LIEBESLIEDER WALZER film was actually shown in a movie theater on Broadway in the 70's (think it was the Embassy Theater)....and several of us went to see it! How much fun it was to see ourselves on the big screen! There were many close-ups of my hands and face, as well as everyone else's. I had always wanted to be in film...and voila! Here it was!
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